Confessions of a Reformission Rev.
by Mark Driscoll
In this book Mark Driscoll recounts many of the stories from the first years of his church planting experience and summarizes the stages of growth along the way, from having 0 people to having over 4,000 people. Driscoll is the lead planter of Mars Hill Church in Seattle and founder of Acts 29 Network of church planters, which has assisted in over 60 church plants in the United States and abroad in the last six years. This book is gut-wrenchingly hilarious, raw, and honest. The insight Mark brings to young churches who are still in their early years of life (like ours) is very rich and valuable. We will be ordering a few copies of this book for the Oasis Bookstore, and you can purchase one at our Sunday gathering.
I began reading the book on our flight back from Orlando last week, and I couldn’t put it down. A couple of times April was falling asleep next to me and I would begin laughing out loud and wake her up and say, "Here, read from this line down to this line." Over and over again she got to read pieces of the funniest stories. Here is a sample excerpt of one of the stories that made us laugh. It comes from the chapter when they were between 75–150 people.
During the summer, we continued our midweek outdoor Bible study but moved it to a new park just off a waterway that was heavily trafficked by boaters. People sat on a grassy area under a large totem pole, while the band and I stood on a dock. It was a beautiful setting with boats passing by and the sun setting over Lake Washington. We baptized new converts in the water while everyone cheered.
The only problem ended up being the boaters. I could not see what was going on behind me because my back was to the water while I was teaching. During our first meeting, our people kept waving at boaters who passed by, which was annoying but kind of cute. One evening a few weeks into the study, no one was looking at me while I taught, and everyone had troubled looks on their faces. I turned around to see a bunch of frat guys with their shorts around their ankles, mooning my church as what was apparently one of their dad’s boats passed by. It was tough to preach with a backdrop of hairy heinies.
A few weeks later, I again noticed that no one was looking at me while I preached and turned around to see a few well-endowed young women passing by on a boat, lifting up their shirts like Mardi Gras princesses as they flashed our Bible study. I used the moment to say something about choosing the location because of its natural beauty but not anticipating that much natural beauty and went on to say something about total depravity and how only in our city could we be flashed at a Bible study.
Here are the chapter headings for the book:
- Jesus, Our Offering Was $137 and I Want to Use It to Buy Bullets
0-45 People - Jesus, If Anyone Else Calls My House, I May Be Seeing You Real Soon
45-75 People - Jesus, Satan Showed Up and I Can’t Find My Cup
75-150 People - Jesus, Could You Please Rapture the Charismaniac Lady Who Brings Her Tambourine to Church?
150-350 People - Jesus, Why Am I Getting Fatter and Meaner?
350-1,000 People - Jesus, Today We Voted to Take a Jackhammer to Your Big Church
1,000-4,000 People - Jesus, We’re Loading Our Squirt Guns to Charge Hell Again
4,000-10,000 People
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